So, it’s been awhile since I was last on this site. Five years to be exact. It is amazing how true the saying is that, “the days go by slow, but the years go by fast.” When I first moved back home to Chicago, my intent was to continue sharing my experiences as a teacher, mother, runner, and woman in today’s society. However, over time, I felt that blogging under the name “pseducator” (public school educator) wasn’t genuine since I was not teaching in a public school at the time. I thought about creating a new blog, but to be honest, life got in the way, and I never got around to it. So, here I am, back in the public education sector, and ready to muse about all that life has to offer. Since I last wrote you, so much has happened in my life and the world itself. To be honest, many times when I would be out running, I would craft a new blog post in my mind and think about getting on here to write it. I apologize that I never did, but I look forward to all that we have to discuss. If you were a previous follower of this blog, welcome back! If you are new to this site, welcome! Let this be the beginning of a long and fruitful relationship. I’ll talk to you soon.
Category: Parenting, Running, Fitness
The Back Issue
I believe that I have established the fact that I am passionate about running. It is an integral part of who I am. So, when I am not able to run, I do not feel like I am myself. And in the middle of all the turmoil in my life right now, not being able to run is driving me batty.
I have always had issues with my back since being injured in a severe car accident at the age of 15. Every once in awhile, it would act up more than others. I would visit a chiropractor, have some adjustments, and then everything would return to normal. Several years ago, my lower back started causing me even more difficulty. It would start to “go” more often. There are two specific incidents I can remember that foreshadowed the current conditions wherein I now find myself. The first was when I was rolling my compact refrigerator from my regular classroom to the room where I would be teaching summer school. There was a slight step up from the hall into the class. I went to lift the cart up slightly and felt a sharp pain in my lower back. It shot up my back and down my leg, but after stretching for a bit (once I recovered from the pain), it seemed to be okay. Then, right before New Year’s Eve a few years ago, I went to get out of bed and felt a pop. At the same time, pain shot from my lower back all through my body. I was unable to move. Thank God I had my phone right next to me. I texted my daughter, who was across the house in her room. I still remember how the color drained out of her face when she walked in my room and saw the pain I was in. It took almost 45 minutes to get me from the bed to the car. Then, the first walk-in clinic I went to wasn’t that helpful. I then spent the next few weeks going to the chiropractor three times per week getting my back fixed. However, I never visited a medical doctor, and that was probably a costly error on my part.
Fast forward to 2011. In October of that year, I ran the Atlanta Marathon. Somehow, the fact that Atlanta was so hilly had escaped me during all my training. I don’t like looking at course maps in too much detail because I don’t want my mind to start envisioning worst-case scenarios. I don’t pay too much attention to the elevation because I’m going to run the course anyway so why freak myself out? However, up until that point, I had ran (mostly) only flat courses. I had driven through Atlanta, but had never walked through the city. So I had no frame of reference for this race. It was 26.2 miles of grueling hills. I remember how disappointed I was at the finish because I didn’t set a new PR. Little did I know that that should’ve been the least of my worries.
After the race, I took off a couple of weeks to rest. Yet, once I started running again, something wasn’t right. I felt achy, but different from the normal, “I just ran a marathon,” achy. My running was sporadic at best, even though I had an upcoming half-marathon. Although I knew I didn’t train properly for that race, it was my favorite course, I had already registered, so I was running it anyway. Probably not the best decision. At the end of that race, I fell to the ground in such pain I knew I had to give in and go to the doctor.
Long story short, I eventually found out that I had two “severely ruptured” discs in my spine: my L5 and S1. My running, and all other physical activity, came to a screeching halt. I went through physical therapy and epidural injections. After what seemed like an eternity, I was cleared to “run” again. I had to start with strict walking and work my way up, just like I do with brand new runners that join my cross country team. I also started going to yoga as soon as I was cleared by my sports doctor. At this point, I have been running fairly consistently for almost a year, but not without setbacks. When they occur, I try to keep perspective, but sometimes it’s hard. Right now, my back seems to be hurting more than usual. The pain that runs down my right leg has been acting up quite a bit. So, I have tried to be smart and not force anything, but it’s hard. With everything in chaos around me, I yearn for the open road. Yet, since I want to run for the rest of my life, I will be patient, rest, stretch, and take care of my body. Therefore, if you are a runner, count your blessings and go run one for me today.
Reclaiming Saturdays
I have recently fallen in love with Saturday mornings. Anyone with children knows that Saturdays tend to be as hectic as a weekday. You get up early, maybe do some housecleaning before you run to the grocery store or take the kids to whatever activities they have going on that day. Then, your kids hit the point where they can drive themselves to their activities, but as their mom you are still obligated to attend. However, not too long after that, they reach a point where they no longer have activities for you to attend. At that point, you wake up on a Saturday morning and think, “Wow, I have nothing going on today.” Although I work nights at my part-time job on the weekends, I am currently at that point, and I don’t feel guilty admitting that I’m enjoying it. I wake up on Saturday mornings, go to yoga class, and then go run the causeway spanning across the river. Often, I am rewarded for my efforts with the sight of dolphins playing in the water. Occasionally, after I’ve put in all that hard work burning calories, I’ll stop at the local coffee shop and enjoy what they call an iced heroin (with skim milk AND whipped cream. A girl’s gotta have priorities!) At those moments, I feel so refreshed, in tune with myself, and at peace with the world around me. If your children are currently at a stage in your life where Saturdays are a whirlwind, don’t worry – your time will come. It will happen faster than you could ever imagine, though, so cherish your time with them while you can. For those who are facing those empty Saturdays, use them to find yourself again. Go for a run, take that painting class, or curl up in the hammock and read a book. Above all, don’t feel guilty for being happy to have those moments back to yourself. You deserve them. Namaste.
I am a Runner
It is fitting that my first blog about running is being written tonight. Tomorrow morning, I am running our local art festival’s 5k race. Seven years ago, this is the race that started it all. I have ran at various times in my life. I was on my middle school track team; I ran for fun during high school (too bad my tiny private school didn’t have a track team); I ran for fitness. However, that first 5k is when I became a runner. I loved the camaraderie, the challenge, and then the thrill of finishing. I was hooked. Later that same year, my marriage began to fall apart as I found out that my now ex-husband was seeing another woman. It crushed my spirit. Even though this was my second marriage, I had poured myself into making this family work so my children could have the stability of a two-parent home. Their biological father had all but vanished from their lives due to his struggles with mental illness and addiction. My son didn’t even remember him and considered his step-father to be his “dad.” I thought, although we had our struggles, overall we were a happy family. Imagine my shock to find out this wasn’t the case. In the middle of this heartbreak, I turned to running. Out on the open road, it was just me and God. As I ran, I would pray, reminisce, sort through my thoughts, meditate, and just be. My runs were a respite from the circumstances in my life I couldn’t control. I could control every aspect of my runs- how far, how fast, how frequent. A year later, I ran that same art fest 5k. This time, there wasn’t anyone waiting for me at the finish line. But I ran it quite a bit faster than I had the year before 🙂 And I felt like a load had been lifted off me as I crossed that finish line. I knew I was strong. I knew I could overcome. I knew I wanted more. So I signed up for my first half-marathon seven months later. Training for that first half gave me so much strength, physically, spiritually, and emotionally. So of course, when I completed that one, I a) signed up for another and b) signed up for my first marathon. Running my first marathon was an experience that deserves its own entry, but suffice to say for now that it was one of the crowning achievements in my life. And here I am, seven years later….still running. There have been obstacles along the way – a fractured foot, ruptured discs, grad school. Yet, I always return to running. A happy life requires balance. My family fuels my heart, my faith fuels my spirit, but running fuels my soul.
The Introduction
Welcome! As I thought about how to begin this blogging journey, I decided that the best thing to do was introduce myself. Yet, the thought of introducing myself leads to much more complex scenarios. Where do I start? If I were to create a list, it would look something like the following: I am a…. Mother, Teacher, Friend, Runner, Yogi, Conqueror, Positive Force, Adventurer, Service Industry Worker, Music and Book Lover, etcetera etcetera etcetera (as the King of Siam would say). These titles and adjectives only create a superficial scratch in the surface. There is no way to sum up in one short paragraph the essence of who I am, or any individual for that matter. However, this why I am compelled to write. To share my musings on my life and the world that surrounds me. My hope is, while expressing my humanity, I will in some small way connect to yours. So, again… Welcome! I hope you will enjoy reading my writings as much as I will enjoy creating them. Til next time…
Words from the Long Run 