Tag: Random

Will I or Won’t I?

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Girls, Motivational, Running, fitness, Women

The last time I wrote, I shared that I was training for my 3rd Chicago marathon. Well, marathon training is ramping up with my first double digits run happening this weekend. I’ve been pushing myself to be consistent in my training in hopes of being able to – if not get a new personal best time – then to at least finish in under five hours. Seeing as the last time I ran a marathon in under five hours was over a decade ago, I know it’s a lofty goal. But, it’s one I’m still willing to work for.

I’ve shared here before that I love how running is truly an excellent analogy for life. We are all running this marathon called life together, and while there are always other factors at play, how well we do primarily depends on how much work we are willing to put in. We all have the same start and will all end up at the same finish. I’m not trying to be metaphorical here. We are all born, and we will all die. What we do with the time we have between those two points will determine how successful we are, just as the training I choose to do (or not do) determines how successful my marathon attempt will be.

As a former varsity cross country and track coach, I used to remind my athletes that they needed to focus on running “their” race. There were always going to be runners who were faster than them, and for some of them having a 1st, 2nd, or even 3rd place finish was not realistic. They needed to keep their own goals in mind as those were the ones that were realistic for them. Now, as a life coach for adults, I use a goal format where one of the tenants are for the goal to be “realistic.” It’s the non-running version of running your own race. While it’s important and necessary for us to aim high, if we consistently create unattainable goals for ourselves we will end up feeling defeated. I have always set high expectations for myself, my former students and athletes, and now my clients, but they have been designed around realistic outcomes. I never set a goal for a brand new runner who could barely run 10 minute miles to cut that time to 4 minute miles by the end of the season, but I would set the goal that they shave it down to 7 or 8 because while it would take hard work on their part, it was still something I knew they could accomplish.

So, I guess I said all that to say this – is running a marathon in under 5 hours a realistic goal for me? At this point and time, I’m saying yes. Now…ask me again a month from now, and we’ll see if my answer has changed. Follow along on my training journey to find out!

Also, I’m running the marathon in support of Girls in the Game, a fantastic organization providing sports programming and more for girls all throughout Chicago. If you’d like to make a donation, please click here for my fundraising page. Every dollar counts, and is fully tax-deductible.

Thank you for your support as both a reader and a donor!

If Planning a Trip to Italy or France…

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Travel, Uncategorized

I did it! After all the planning and preparation over the last several months, I have just returned home from my very first solo international trip. I spent a week in Italy and a week in France, and it was even more than I expected it to be. In the months leading up to my trip, people would often ask me what I was most looking forward to, ask about my plans, even inquire about whether or not I was nervous to go alone. No matter how many conversations I had, books and websites I read, or research I conducted though, nothing could adequately prepare me for this journey. It’s much like having a baby. You can read about it, go to childbirth classes, and talk to the hundreds who have had this same experience before you, but it still does not prepare you for the reality of your own child birthing process and when your baby arrives. Many people have asked me about my trip though, so I am going to attempt to share some of my process with all of you.

To start with, I knew I wanted the bookends of my trip to be Paris and Rome. I eventually decided to start in Rome and finish in Paris because I knew I would be tired at the end of my trip and wanted to have more energy for Rome. I stand by that decision. Rome (all of Italy really) was hotter than France, and seemed to be more crowded and frenetic than Paris. Furthermore, in Rome I did a lot more walking (11-15 miles per day). I think if I had done it the other way around, I definitely would’ve regretted it. In all, I visited Rome, Florence, Venice, the Cinque Terre, Avignon, Versailles, and Paris. It was a whirlwind tour!

I chose to use Air BnBs as they were cheaper than hotels but nicer than hostels. With the exception of one location, I had entire apartments to myself for less than the price of a hotel room! I only used locations that were verified Superhosts, carefully read about the amenities, and researched the locations. I ended up with a view of the Colosseum in Rome, right in the middle of one of the most popular areas in Venice, the most perfect view in Manarola, practically next door to the Palace of the Popes in Avignon, and next door to the Picasso Museum and around the corner from public transit in Paris. It pays to do your research! The only time I wasn’t in the middle of things was my one hotel in Florence, and I had booked that based more on its price than paying attention to its location (a major mistake I won’t ever make again!)

Navigating the trains from city to city was much easier than I had expected it to be. After the first couple of times, I felt like a pro arranging my transport from one area of the country to the other. It is definitely cheaper to just buy as you go versus using the rail pass if you are just doing a couple of countries. Also, buying your tickets along the way allows you to have flexibility of staying longer in one area or leaving sooner than you had originally planned. The trains are generally clean inside, although many of the one in Italy have graffiti all over the outsides of them. Here’s a tip – the train stations (and actually most public restrooms) in both Italy and France charge one euro to use the restroom. There are bathrooms on the trains, and they are free (although they are just glorified portapotties).

For those of you planning your trips overseas, bring a water bottle! There are public water fountains everywhere, and the water is usually just as cold as if you bought it from the store, especially in Rome where the fountains are fed by aqueducts. It’s an adventure just exploring all the different fountains in the city, as there are hundreds – and all of them unique and beautiful in some way.

Lastly, I think one of the things I enjoyed the most about my trip was allowing myself the freedom of flexibility. If I wanted to sit in a sidewalk cafe and write in my journal for awhile, I did. If I saw a church spiral off in the distance I wanted to see up close, I’d figure out how to navigate myself to that point. Don’t pack your itinerary so full that you feel pressured to get it all done. Let the magic of the moment guide you at times and be willing to try new things. Do what matters to you, not what everyone else says you just “have to do while you’re there.”

In closing, my trip was all I wanted it to be and already has me planning for another. Thank you to all who read this quite lengthy post. Please feel free to comment or ask questions below and to share this post with others. Ciao! Au revoir! Until next time, I leave you with one of my favorite pictures from my trip.

Status Update

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Uncategorized

When I last wrote to you all, I had presented my summer “to-do” list. This being only the second time in my teaching career where I have a full summer break, I was purposeful at the beginning to make sure I would be using this time wisely. Fast forward three weeks, and the status update is as follows:

  1. Half-marathon training: I have been running more consistently than I have in probably a year. In addition to my running, I have been going to yoga and other workouts designed to help me build my strength and speed as a runner. My pace is still slower than I would like it to be, but as I focus on more speed workouts in the upcoming months, I am hoping that will improve.
  2. Organizing/Cleaning my apartment: I am happy to report that I have made quite a bit of progress in this area! When I look around my apartment, I can see the areas where there has been improvement. Alas, I can also see the many areas where I need to get it in gear, especially since I essentially only have two weeks to finish up these projects before I return to work.
  3. Focusing on writing: At the beginning of this summer, I set an ambitious goal to write a new post for both of my blogs at least once weekly. Well, that hasn’t quite happened, although in addition to writing for my other blog, I did also get quite a bit of journaling done. Next week I will be leaving for my vacation. I am bringing my laptop and plan on blogging about all my adventures, as this will be a first-time experience for me and many of my friends have asked for me to share my stories.
  4. Getting ready for my trip: I feel that this is where I have made the most progress. I did not realize how time-consuming planning a solo two-week European vacation would be. Not only did I book all my Air BnBs, but I have also researched and booked all of my tours, excursions, experiences, etc. While this has taken quite a bit of my time since I last wrote you, it has been very fulfilling. I am so excited for my trip and can’t believe that I will be heading out in only eight days!
  5. Preparing for my new website launch: This is probably the area where I have made the least progress, which is ironic because it is definitely the one I thought I would most focus on when this summer began. However, I still have some time to be more productive in this area and have made sure to include it in my schedule to ensure that I do just that.

I feel that going through this list, the wins/losses columns are pretty even at this point. Because of some work commitments that I have going on next week, I will only have two or three days before my trip to devote to anything. Upon return from my trip, I will have one week of vacation left before returning to work. I understand that it’s crunch time, which is why I am sitting in a coffee shop on a beautiful summer day writing to all of you and creating new content for my website. Thank you for supporting me as I focus on achieving my goals. Feel free to comment/share what you are currently focusing on so I can return the favor!

The Beginning of the End…and the End of the Beginning

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Education, Parenting, Uncategorized

Although it seems as if school has ended for everyone, the district where I teach still has another week to go. The last day for students is next Thursday, the 20th. For teachers? Well, we have not only Friday the 21st to go, but also Monday the 24th. However, it is close enough to the end of this year to finally feel it is the right time for reflection.

This year was one of major changes for me professionally. It was my first year in a new role and with a new district. I had to learn all new systems – and am still learning them. I had to get to know new administrators and teaching staff, and also learn how I fit into this organization. It was my first time not having my own classroom or a home room of my own students, but instead being a part of multiple classrooms and working with a variety of students in all grade levels. It was a year where I often felt I didn’t quite fit in, even though I was serving in exactly the role I wanted for myself. I was no longer a classroom teacher in the traditional sense, but I also was not technically an administrator. It has been a year of challenging myself in new ways and identifying new goals. On top of that, as I shared with readers in a previous blog, this past year was one of great loss and deep grief. Managing all of these obstacles has been hard, but I’ve made it. This is just the beginning of this chapter of my life, so I look forward to how the rest of the story will play out.

For all my fellow educators, I hope you have time this summer to pursue the things that are important to you. Parents, take the time to make memories with your children. Students, be open to explore new places and ideas because you are only young once. Congratulations to everyone for closing out another school year, but remember that summer is just the start of yet another adventure. Let’s go write the next chapter of our lives.

More Than Words

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Uncategorized

Four months ago today, I lost my soulmate. Her name was Chanda, and she had been my best friend for over 30 years. We had walked this path of life together since we were 11 years old. We were together through puberty, adolescence, college, marriages, children, divorces, and everything else under the sun. I wrote on this blog of her dad’s passing back in 2013 and how it changed everything. However, losing her changes things even more profoundly than that event had. I mentioned previously that there were life-altering events that occurred in 2018, and this is definitely the biggest one. Her passing has changed everything forever and in every way, and although it is still too soon and the wounds are still too fresh to write freely today, I was compelled to pause for a moment to remember her. For in remembering those who pass before us, we honor them and the impact they had on our lives. She was my “Thunder Buddy for Life,” and I miss her more than words can express.

Every Day I’m Shuffling

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Motivational, Running, fitness, Uncategorized

2018 was a year full of fantastic high points and absolutely devastating low ones. I know people often write their reflections on the previous year sometime in January, but I have only recently returned to blogging, so I missed the boat then. However, there are things about last year I need to share in order to fully write about the present or begin to look towards the future.

Tomorrow I am running the Chicago Shamrock Shuffle for the 6th year in a row. I love this race, and it is often the official start of racing/running season for me. Last year I almost didn’t participate in this event though, because approximately six weeks prior, on the day after Super Bowl Sunday, I was rushed to the emergency room with excruciating pain. I could barely swallow or speak. I thought it was a lymph node infection or something like that, but I didn’t believe it was anything dangerous. Boy, was I wrong! The speed and efficiency at which the hospital staff moved once they determined the danger I was in was impressive. Long story short, the infection had caused swelling which in turn had caused my airway to become constricted. I had to have an emergency tracheotomy performed in order to save my life and a complex surgery to get rid of the infection. It was the scariest health situation I have ever been in, but ultimately – I. Am. Here.

Last year I was cleared to run this race only a couple of weeks prior to the event. I didn’t care though. I was just ecstatic to be out there. I actually cried a little as I ran around the last bend before the finish line because I was so grateful to still be alive, much less running. This year, I’m trying to set a new personal record on this course as a testament to still being alive and a tribute to those who have gone on before me. Every day is such a gift. Let us use those gifts wisely as we shuffle on.

‘Cause everything you thought would last forever

Never lasts forever like you plan

Don’t let your now become another

So take life by the hands while you still can – Brothers Osborne

40 Days of Kindness

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Uncategorized

Yesterday was the beginning of Lent. I am not Catholic, but I have pushed myself every year to give things up during this season. As I tell those who ask why I do this, Catholics do not have the market cornered on giving things up, or sacrificing, in order to receive clarity, direction, or to get more in tune with their spiritual side, etc. However, 2018 was one heck of a year (the details of which I’ll slowly be sharing with you over the next few weeks), and during the month of February, I felt led to go on a Daniel Fast. I spent 21 days giving up pretty much everything I enjoyed, as far as food and drink goes. So as I was considering Lent, I really was stumped about what to do. Until I became inspired by one of my friends. He shared with me that one of his friends uses Lent to add something in to his life versus taking something out. He goes to the gym every day, commits to read for an hour, or to try something new. This inspired me, and thus the 40 Days of Kindness mission was born. I want to spend each day of this season purposefully looking for ways to be kind to others. And not just those within my social circle or personal networks. I want to be kind to those who would be least expecting it…and quite possibly could need it the most. Shortly after committing to this act, my school announced it has having a kindness assembly – which happened today. Confirmation that I chose the right idea. I’ll keep you updated on how it goes!

Day 1) complimented a random stranger (Lame, I know, but it was almost midnight.)

Fast Forward Five Years

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Parenting, Empty Nest, Uncategorized

The last time I posted back in 2014, I talked about not really knowing anyone here in the city. As a middle-aged mom with an empty nest in a city of millions, and in the dead of one of the coldest winters in decades, meeting people was a little difficult – to put it lightly. But as the weather warmed up, and I ventured out, I started to connect with other people, and since that time I’m happy to report that I have met so many wonderful people and have added such meaningful relationships to my life. Making new friends is hard at any stage of life. It requires a person to be willing to take some risks. Yes, in some cases you might get hurt, but I have found that more often than not, the energy you put out into the world is what will make its way back to you. If you find yourself feeling alone and in need of friends, the best advice I can give is to start by being friendly to others. Be willing to try new things and strike up conversations with people around you. As human beings, we are wired to desire connections with others. Just a smile or a warm greeting could be enough to spark new friendships. Also…offering s’mores….that will definitely help foster lasting friendships. But more on that another time!

So Much to Say (sorry, DMB)

by Kimberly Frey, posted in Education, Parenting, Empty Nest, Running, fitness, Uncategorized

I must admit – since the last time I actually wrote, there have been many times when I’ve started a new blog post in my mind (usually while running or when reading something interesting while on my commute to work). Unfortunately, I didn’t sit and actually write them. That is definitely something I am going to work on improving over the course of this year. The whole reason I started this blog is because I have a lot to say, but it doesn’t do much good if I don’t actually take the time to say it.
Having gotten that off my chest, there is so much going on right now. Winter is fading, spring break is four days away (along with a trip to Florida), my son is officially living here (and just got a job!), I’m running strong again (outside!)…the list could go on. It’s hard to believe I’ve already been back in the city for almost nine months. Every day, I wake up at peace with my decision to move up here- even though I miss my Florida friends and family dearly. I still haven’t met a lot of people outside of my co-workers, but with the weather warming up, I’m looking forward to being out and about in the city and having more opportunities to strike up friendships. While my work is emotionally exhausting at times, I love my students and the adults who work alongside me. I am loving my life and want to help others do the same. So excuse me for being all over the place with this post. I promise I’ll be more on-topic in the future, or at least stick to one topic. For now, to borrow from my absolute favorite band yet again – “Celebrate we will, because life is sweet but short for certain.” (Dave Matthews Band for those who aren’t in the know)